Day 1 of LDR
I’ve never been so emotional about someone leaving the country (for an adequate time enough to be dramatic about). Except this time it happened to be my boyfriend.
Ive had a couple of friends who’ve migrated to the States or Canada. They were migrating. My boyfriend’s contract is only for 10 months and I feel as if I’m grieving over his death. :))
I treated it lightly when he told me his schedule on the cruise ship in Sydney would start on the first week of December. It was all so sudden. He was only given about 3 weeks notice. It got hectic preparing for a going away party for him, moving out of the condo we lived in. So i guess i was too preoccupied to think of him leaving.
It only sunk in the moment we were clearing up the last few things in the condo. He asked me if i wanted any toilettries around the sink. I saw his cologne and i grabbed it. I told him “ill take this, this reminds me of you.” And when i smelled it, i started to tear up. He hadnt used that cologne in over a year but it was what he was wearing when we first met. I’ll never forget the scent and i wish i could keep a lifetime’s supply.
I guess i’m being overly dramatic but i guess thats how it is when youve shared so much of your life with someone and have become so intimate with each other. Now that we’re not physically together i feel like my feelings and love for him have only grown stronger. I am more sure than ever that this is who i wanna spend the rest of my life with.
I love my job and i love airports. I’ve kinda grown accustomed to sleeping in them. This is me at the Hong Kong International Airport.
Love the view :)
Ignorance is bliss as they say. Then you got, ignorance is not an excuse. I got to feel both sides of the coin today. And i have to say, ignorance can ony last for so long. It may come in handy at first. But when reality hits you, you just wish you had known right from the very start.
Investigate, question, discover!
It’s starting to get really hot and i wanna go to the beach already! Puerto Galera in Mindoro is a good, cheap and pretty nearby get away for people in Manila. If you think the beach is as good as it looks in the pic, you’re mistaken cause the beach can get quite filthy. The most commercialized portion where all the bars are located is called White Beach. But the sand actually feels more like construction sand which can be dusty, and littered with beer bottles, straws, plastic cups and barbeque sticks. During a busy summer weekend the stretch of “white” beach is literally concealed by the sea of people, especially during sundown when everyone’s trying to find a spot to lounge on the beach and drink at night.
So what keeps people coming back here… It’s the food, the drinks and the party scene. Puerto galera is known for their huge servings of Kebabs and their many other grilled food. They also have their signature drink at all the bars, the Mindoro sling, which i guess is kinda just like a Singapore sling. Another thing you’ll find unique to Puerto Galera are the lady boys. These guys become your waitresses at the bars and not only do they serve you, they entertain. Some bars have dance numbers for their lady boys, with all the choreographed sexy dance moves. Lol. This isn’t something you find from a segregation of gay bars from the rest; this is the norm at Puerto.
Hope i go!
Yesterday i just had my 5th regular CT scan check up. I was diagnosed with testicular cancer in Nov 2009, had my right testicle removed the following month and have since been undergoing CT scan checks every 3-5 months just to see if it’ll come back.
I received a strange prayer from a concerned family friend thru e-mail after my revelation, praying for cancer patients like me, and it stressed the need for strong prayers because it is a fact that there is no real cure and cancer cells will eventually resurface. I had to read that prayer over and over before I could understand it wasn’t a very optimistic view on things. Strange how people could be brutally honest. But anyway, I kinda agreed.
If that’s the case, i wondered if life’s other cancers are meant to find their way back and eat you up alive. Is it a matter of catching the inevitable just in time before it ruins you?
Jealousy, mistrust, possessiveness… They can consume your sanity so fast without you even realizing how bad it’s gotten. It’s not good for the soul and definitely not good for a frail heart.
I don’t know if acceptance is the key to this discomfort.. The acceptance of the inevitable. Sometimes things will take it’s natural course in life. And the best you can do is to be wary of life’s negativties. If it happens it happens. If it doesn’t, it doesn’t. You can’t really prevent something from happening per se. It will happen regardless of you if it has to. The best we can do is manage our feelings and accept that the world does not revolve around us.
Just a blip
The word kinda sums up the way i feel about my existence in this world. I thought i coined the word “blip” on my own, while trying to find a username for my alternate accounts online. For me it was just a spin on the words British-Filipino, my nationality. I couldnt even come up with something more substantial than race.
I looked up the actual definition later and found its description to be fitting to my life. Blip: a trace, an interruption; something relatively small or inconsequential within a larger context. That’s exactly how I feel in this world. What difference do i make?
My first blog :p
Basically, started this account so i could comment on my friend’s blog and stay updated. Seems like a good venue to share, without really caring much what people think. I guess I’ll keep myself somewhat anonymous here.